11/28/2023 0 Comments Aim away messagesYou’re a struggling comedian living in Los Angeles. You’ve used the term “wanderlust” more than once and love the show Pretty Little Liars. Instagram this week released a new feature called Notes, and with it, one thing has become immediately clear: the away message is back, and oh how we’ve missed it. They live in the DMs tab and remain for 24 hours. You have a Pinterest board you update regularly and reblog quotes attributed to Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn. Published Instagram Notes are new status bubbles that let users post 60 characters of text or emojis. “don’t cry becuz it’s over, smile becuz it happened (:” Now you spend your days swiping on Tinder and pretending you’re happy doing so. You fell in love once, but your heart was mangled and stomped all over. Real romantic intimacy scares the shit out of you, so you make dick jokes to keep yourself at a safe distance. “doing homework but wish i was doing u )” You get really sad if you look at your phone after leaving a movie theater and see nobody texted you during that hour and a half. You’re constantly plugged into your phone and the one time you left home without it, you felt itchy all day. You think life should revolve around two things: happy hour and bottomless mimosas at brunch. You still think Facebook is an appropriate place for long, vague posts that beg the question, “Is everything okay?” But if someone asks, you’ll say, “I don’t really want to talk about it. guess its tru what they say, u never know who ur friends are until someone stabs u in the back! w/e” *Something passive aggressive about an unknown situation* You make fun of people who go to Coachella even though down deep, you’re dying to don a flower crown in the desert. You eventually made the transition to Tumblr, where you can still be found posting free verse poetry about fruit and your ex from five years ago. You definitely wrote the occasional fanfic on your secret LiveJournal. “Well if u wanted honesty, that’s all u had 2 say / I never want to let u down or have u go, it’s better off this way” *lyrics to a My Chemical Romance or Dashboard Confessional song* On Tuesday, the social media platform rolled out a series of updates, including. “I’m just glad Livejournal isn’t still a thing - he can avoid the embarrassment of posting poetry or poorly translated lines from Amelie, which we never watched together.”Īt press time, Harwood finally landed on setting his preferred away message as his Tinder bio, and was seen swiping right endlessly, alone in the dark, listening to Fevers and Mirrors.1. AOL Instant Messenger, or AIM, is dead but the away message lives on, thanks to a recent Instagram update. “I actually muted him on all social media after he changed his profession on Facebook to be ‘Professionally alone for all eternity,’ and then put on LinkedIn under ‘Achievements,’ ‘Winner of all the best deception and the clever cover story awards,’” said Larson on a date with her new boyfriend. Indeed, Harwood later posted an Instagram story of himself clumsily playing “Hands Down” by Dashboard Confessional on an acoustic guitar. “Then he posted a #tbt on Instagram - even though it’s Monday - of him at some show buying a T-shirt for his ex… I guess hoping she’d see it? The caption just said, ‘Don’t you see, don’t you see.’ I don’t know what he’s trying to do, but I doubt it’s gonna work out how he hopes.” “He tweeted, ‘And with my one last gasping breath I’d apologize for bleeding on your shirt 6/28 <3,’ but deleted it almost immediately,” Kerner said. Harwood’s roommate Mara Kerner, closely following Harwood’s social media activity during his introspection, confirmed his attempts to replicate the AIM away message function. But now, I don’t know… how do I make sure everyone, especially her, knows that I don’t want to feel this way forever? A dead letter marked returned to sender.” “I needed to set an away message on AIM with Cursive lyrics, or maybe Say Anything lyrics - or maybe even a combination of the two. “Sam and I dated for three wonderful months… and after the breakup, I knew there was really only one way to get my feelings out there,” said Harwood. Recently single 31-year-old Alexander Harwood is reportedly longing today for the era in which grief and sorrow was solely expressed through away messages on AOL Instant Messenger.
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